A well-oiled list of conversation topics ready to roll out is only one part of what matters to have a good conversation – it isn’t your complete solution to make friends and influence people. You can have fun talking about paper to a friend because good conversation is more than topics. Work on listening, positive body language, and your personality seen below (as well as other skills not listed):

Use the conversation subjects you’re about to discover with other conversation skills for the best results! If you’re over the standard enquirying about someone’s weekend, commenting on the weather, and asking “How are you?”, here’s my top list of conversation topics to keep a good conversation going. Some are deep, some are light, and all are real topics you can use that help you come up with your own.

Business Conversation Topics

1. Current News Stories

Eye the latest news stories relating to your industry. Signup to an RSS reader, visit your industry’s best blogs, then add their RSS feed to your reader. You instantly get updated with new articles and can scan topics useful for conversation.

In your RSS reader, you can even setup separate categories to easily monitor sites covering fun topics, international issues (amazing tip for when you’re about to travel overseas!), and client industry news. When it comes to talking about these topics, you impress people as an expert if you reference where the news came from.

2. The Economy

The economy affects business, for good or for bad. Professionals often discuss how the economy is affecting their company. Be careful not to turn the conversation to personal finance; discussing your own money is crude. Read up on stock markets, interest rates, and other factual information.

3. Ask for Advice

Anything from “Can you show me how to use the photocopier?” to “Can you give me some tips on managing the finance department?” gives a co-worker pride. Few resist the call for help. Show you genuinely appreciate their advice by listening, nodding, and thanking. Conversation will flow.

4. Industry Trends

Has your company changed something it does? Companies update their technology, modify a policy, or introduce new fun days at work (well, the lucky ones do). Discuss the pros and cons – comparing to other businesses, e.g. “I don’t like our new company policy on food at desks. What’s your opinion?” “What do you think of parallax web design?” “I developed an app for the new Mozilla platform the other day. It’s surprisingly simple.”

Few resist the call for help.

5. Professional Development

Those who want to develop themselves may read books and attend events to help get ahead. Asking “What are the most influential business/motivational books you’ve ever read?” could lead into a discussion of self-help, famous motivational speakers, and cool habits to develop.

6. Personal History and Goals

It’s the past and present of one’s life. If you want to know someone outside the business setting, ask “How did you get started in the industry?” You learn more about people this way, and get to discussing ambitions, goals, and the person’s past. Prepare to share your story. Giving is as important as taking to keep a good conversation going.

Dinner Conversation Topics

7. The Latest Movies or Books

Nearly everybody watches movies, is into a TV show, or reads books. Ask people for their favorite and what they’re currently into. If you haven’t seen the movie or read the book they mention, ask about it with interest!

8. Travel

Whether you talk to a world traveler or someone who doesn’t have a passport, everyone loves traveling. Ask about their most memorable holiday, compare where you’ve been, tell a funny experience with foreigners, or share where you’d like to go.

9. The Pros/Cons of Their Jobs

Most people can talk about their jobs for hours. Some may tell you how wonderful their current workplace. Even if someone hates their job, they’re usually happy to let off steam about their annoying boss. Start with “What do you like most about your job?” or “How did you get into it?”

When sharing stuff about your job, describe it in a way the person will understand by relating it to their experience. “When I get a call from XYZ supplier, I know it’s not going to be good. They’re like a grumpy customer you see that you want to avoid.”

10. “If the world was about to end…”

A question like “What would you do if the world was going to end in 24 hours?” can bring up some interesting answers. Try it with a large group of people. A less morbid example is: “If you could do anything you wanted for one day, with no consequences, what would you do?”

11. The Celebrity Guest List

A classic question: “If you could invite anyone, alive or dead, to your dinner party, who would it be and why?” This leads to discussions about various people in the public eye; great if you don’t have any mutual friends or interests…yet!

12. Food!

At a dinner party, food is on everyone’s mind. Ask what recipes people like to cook, which cuisines they’ve tried, and what restaurants they recommend. Just don’t unfavorably compare the host’s dinner to something else! It’s good social etiquette.

13. The Olden Days…

Share games you use to play as kids, which TV shows you liked, and the adventures you had. It’s great conversation fuel for people over 20 years old. If someone is hesitant to participate, they may have had a bad childhood so don’t force their input. You can also discuss how different things are now from when you were a child, e.g. “Imagine what it would have been like if we’d all had cell phones! When my mom wanted to find me, she’d…”

Funny Conversation Topics

14. Embarrassing Stories

If you’re with a group of friends, sharing embarrassing stories can cause a lot of laughs. You can compare moments of embarrassment in public, drunken blunders, or dating encounters that went wrong. You can also share stories you’ve heard from other people.

15. The People Around You

Look at the people walking by (great if you’re in public) and try guessing facts about them. You can even say that the person with the most interesting interpretation “wins”, e.g. “Look at that guy run! He’s just remembered his girlfriend left her hair clip on his bed, and his wife’s nearly home!” “I think he left the waffle iron on. Everyone loves waffles.”

16. Crazy Comments by Kids

If you’re with a group of friends who have kids (or you’re all teachers), exchange stories about the funny things your kids say and do. There’s probably always something weird, funny, or scarily smart to share.

17. Worst Dates

Ask your friends about the worst date they’ve ever been on. Make sure you have a couple of funny stories of your own to share (without naming anyone). For more ideas, think of awkward situations to be in, but are now funny. These are great to talk about.

18. “What kind of old person would you like to be?”

An interesting question, bound to bring a smile to people’s faces (it’s unexpected). Although many won’t have thought about it before, they’re sure to have an opinion.

19. Jokes

Yes, you can sit around exchanging the funniest jokes you’ve heard. If you’re into comedy, you can discuss the best comedies or stand-up comedians you’ve seen. Try to learn a couple of their jokes to share.

20. Weird Comparisons

For example – “If you were any animal, which animal would you be?” It sounds childish, but can work with anyone. Get people to explain their choice. In a big group of friends, your friends can tell you which animal you’d be, before switching to the next person.

21. Truth and Lies

More of an ice-breaking game. The idea is that everyone gives three statements about themselves – one is true, and two are lies. The other people have to work out which is true. The more interesting or funny the statements, the better.

Conversation Topics for Dates

22. Their Goals and Dreams

Many people enjoy talking about themselves. Try questions like “What job would you really love to do?” to let your date open up. If you get your date opening up about their dreams and ambitions, while being encouraging and supportive, they will feel relaxed around you and value you as a great listener.

23. The Movie You Just Saw

Works after a cinema date or DVD. Ask what they thought of the movie, compare to similar movies, and ask what kind of movies they normally like.

24. All-time Favorites

“What’s your all-time favorite movie/song/book/food?” This gets your date to open up and feel you are interested. It can also lead to suggestions of follow up dates, e.g. “What, you haven’t seen Grease? I’ll have to show it to you sometime!”

25. Funny Things

Laughter is a sign things are going well (unless it’s at you… even then). Try “What kinds of things really make you laugh?” to find out more and turn the topic to funny things. Goofy questions like “Which creature would you most like to be for the day?” can break the ice with some dates.

26. Passions

“What are you really passionate about?” When people discuss their passions, you see who they really are. This gives you a good idea about your date. They will also be impressed when you talk about your own passions, as this is something you talk about easily that lights you up in an attractive way.

27. Travel Bucket List

“Which five places do you most want to visit?” Great for travelers. Comparing places you’ve been and want to go can spark a lot of conversation, and travel stories can be very attractive – especially if you’ve done something fascinating and you’re a good storyteller.

28. What You’re Looking For

Be careful with this one. If you can charmingly ask your date to describe what they’re looking for in a man/woman, it can go one of two ways. You might realize they’re not right for you, or you might get an insight into what to do. This can also lead to funny stories about bad dates.

Dating tip: This is a time to get to know each other, but it’s best to avoid controversial topics where you might disagree. Keep topics light and fun, but throw some unusual questions in there, as many dates involve the same questions over and over. Take things they mention about their lives and expand on them, e.g. “Oh, you mentioned you went to school in Chicago – what did you study?” This could lead to a discussion about universities, the subject is particular, or the city. Relate their experiences back to yourself, but remember this isn’t all about you looking interesting – people like to feel valued. Be interested in your date’s passions, hobbies, and experiences.

Conversation Topics with Women

29. Hobbies

Ask a woman what her hobbies are to get a better idea of good conversation topics. Let her tell you about a hobby she’s really into, and ask questions about it.

30. Advice

Many women love giving advice and solving problems, although spilling your problems is better on a potential friend rather than a date. Mention an interesting problem a friend has been having – nothing too serious. Annoying bosses, co-workers, or dating disasters are good topics.

31. Hopes and Aspirations

A lot of women have big ambitions these days, and sharing them with supportive friends can make them feel great. Ask your female friends where she sees herself in five years time, or what her ideal life would look like.

32. Cooking

It sounds sexist, a lot of women genuinely love cooking. If you find a woman who does, talk about recipes, chefs, and her favorite things to make at home. Then get her to cook for me!

33. Men

Revolutionary fact: women love to gossip about men – comparing good and bad experiences, lusting after attractive men, and generally talking about them. You can start with a celebrity example “Would you rather be stuck on a dessert island with Johnny Depp or Brad Pitt?” or, for extra giggles, people you both know.

34. Gossip

It’s no secret many women love to gossip – usually about people they know, either at work or socially. It isn’t very nice, but “Have you heard that Sandra from finance is pregnant?” (use actual gossip, don’t invent stories) can start a very excited conversation. Gossip can be fine as long as you don’t talk poorly of people.

35. Spirituality

Many women are in touch with their intuitive “spiritual side”, and like to discuss alternative therapies, meditation, dreams, and their soul. It’s hard to broach the topic if you don’t know the woman well. Try playfully asking “Ever had a dream that actually happened?” or “Have you tried yoga?” to enter the waters.

Conversation Topics with Men

36. Movies and Entertainment

For men who enjoy movies and TV, discuss which movies they’ve seen lately, their favorite movie of all time, the best action scene etc. These conversations can go on for a while.

37. Technology

Gadgets and the latest developments, e.g. “Have you seen those Google glasses?” Share opinions, compare crazy inventions you’ve heard of, and come up with ideas somebody should invent.

38. Recent Sports Matches

Most of us men love sports. “Did you see the game last night?” is a typical conversation opener. At least understand the sport to join in!

39. Dream Teams

Does your office have a fantasy football league? It’s fun to discuss your dream sports team, comparing which players you’d recruit. You could also do this with movies or concerts – who’d be the actors in your dream movie?

40. Women

We usually don’t gossip about women like women do about men. Some men compare women they find attractive. A conversation can go along the lines of “Would you?” for various celebrity or known women.

41. Health and Fitness

From the wealth of men’s magazines, it’s clear men prioritize health and fitness. Chat about workout techniques, which gyms are good, what food to eat or avoid. Some guys might not be comfortable discussing it, but if you openly ask their advice they might be happy to.

Deep and Meaningful Conversation Topics

42. The Meaning of Life

Most people have thought about it at some point. Start with “Why are we here (in this existence)?” or “Are we here for a reason, or did we just happen?” A gateway into debating God, destiny, and free will.

43. Subjective Experience

“Is there an objective reality?” Topics ranging from visual illusions to widely different opinions on the same thing can open the topic of how everybody’s reality is constructed from their brains, and therefore different. How do you know the colors you see are the same that everyone else sees?

44. Contribution to Society

Doing good deeds is increasingly popular, yet we’re aware of our society’s impact on the environment and poorer countries. Discuss what you do to make the world a better place, or how you could improve your contribution and minimize your impact.

45. Politics

Although arguments can arise, a healthy political debate is a good thinking exercise. Discuss various points and current political events, as well as the very concept of democracy – “Do the masses really know what’s good for them?”

46. Life on Other Planets

“Do aliens exist? Are they already here? What would they think of us as a race?” Think about what life might be like in the future if humanity were to spread to the stars. This can bring up a lot of interesting ideas.

47. Human Nature

What is human nature? Are we born with our personalities or do we develop them from our upbringing? Share examples of how you think your environment shaped your being, think about twins who are different, and debate whether human nature is intrinsically good or bad.

Other Rules and Tips to Come Up With Your Own Conversation Topics

48. Talk About the Person

On any topic you can ask someone’s opinion or experience.

49. Find That Hot Experience

We usually have something hot in our life at any moment that we’d love to share. Find out what is hot for the person by asking, “What’s big in your life at the moment?” (Thanks to Don Gabor for this question.)

50. List 10 Topics You Love

Then think about how you can talk about them. This prepares you to take a conversation down many routes. Make these topics as diverse as possible so you can connect with a variety of people. Saying you love “League of Legends”, “Skyrim”, and “Battlefield 4” won’t do. You’ll only keep a conversation going in this case if someone else (like me!) loves video games.

51. Avoid Edgy Topics

Skip topics like health ailments, family problems, and money. You can talk about these but it’s just risky for most people. By all means, if you’re confident experiment with these topics. Because they are edgy, they may get certain people yapping away.

52. Conversation Starters

Review my list of 101 conversation starters for great ideas to get talking with people you don’t know.

All conversation topics are like herbs in a recipe. If you only use herbs or concern yourself with what to say, the end result will be weird. When used with other ingredients, they’re an essential part of the whole.

As you get better with all your conversation skills, you only need one or two topics to get going as the conversation carries itself through a variety of topics you could not conceive earlier. The effortless discussion may come from a weird fact, a story, or someone’s opinion about the initial topic. These are the best conversation topics.

For everything you need to develop people skills for a great life, even if you’re shy, I suggest you get my Big Talk course.

What then is social etiquette and why must you learn these hidden tips your parents never taught you?

I believe society developed social etiquette rules over time to ensure its smooth functioning and pleasure of people. Etiquette matters to you because it is core to get work, make friends, and well, fit in. Children need it for the same reasons. Anyone with poor social etiquette creates awkward moments with people shrieking at each other wishing the rule-breaker to vanish. Even when you gain nothing, good etiquette is virtuous. It makes the world a better place.

Rules of social etiquette stem from two qualities: respect and empathy. Smile at someone you meet (respect). Apologize for knocking into a stranger to show displeasure with yourself (empathy). Introduce unmet friends to one another so they are not left alone (respect and empathy). Check with the public transport passenger beside you if your music is too loud (respect and empathy).

When you find yourself lost at restaurant, meeting someone new, or feeling out of your league in a wealthy environment, do that which entails respect and empathy. You will be sensitive to the feelings of others to charm men and women.

Specific guidance helps so I have a monstrous list of 89 tips for you in a variety of situations from meeting people to etiquette in business and public transport. A lot of the social etiquette rules shared below are in Emily Post’s Etiquette. It is a 900-page authority resource on general etiquette I read and encourage you to get if etiquette interests you.

Onwards to the 89 social etiquette rules and tips you may have never learned from your parents:

When Meeting People

1. Acknowledge people you know. Whether it is a head nod, wave, or “Hello”. The fundamental of good social manners when meeting people is responding to their presence.
2. Hold your drink and other objects in your left-hand to keep your right-hand free for handshakes.
3. Stand when you greet someone. Especially obey this etiquette rule when meeting someone for the first time. Don’t stress if it’s difficult to stand like when a baby is in your lap. When you are unable to stand, leaning forward can be a substitute to show interest.
4. Once you stand to meet someone, smile and offer your hand to the person for a handshake. It’s a simple way to make a good first impression.
5. When meeting close friends and family of the opposite sex, you can kiss them on their right cheek. Move straight-in and kiss on their right-side to stop head bumps. Whether a kiss is acceptable or not may change across cultures.
6. Greet a family member and anyone staying in your home when you see them for the first time in the day. A simply acknowledgment like “Hey” and “Good morning” can make the home a more pleasant place to live.
7. Introduce two people to each other if they have not met. Letting your girlfriend stand awkwardly smiling amongst your friends will have her leave you in no time.
8. If you are introducing two people to each other, look at the person you are introducing someone to. So if you are introducing Jane to Dad, look at Dad when saying, “Dad, I’d like you to meet Jane.”
9. When groups of people are involved in an introduction, share attention. Look equally at those you introduce and talk about each person as much as the other. Ranting on about Jane in her introduction then saying, “Oh, this is Tara” is not cool. This etiquette rule is especially true for couples when you habitually ignore the person you know less about.
10. Start a conversation when introducing people. Add information so the couple can start chatting without your presence. “Dad, Jane loves coffee maybe as much you.” “Tom’s brother actually lives in the area.” “Steve just moved from north of us and started working here.”
11. When you are introduced to others, listen carefully for their names. If you forget, be courteous by saying, “I’m sorry, I forgot your name. What was it again?”
12. For self-introductions, share your name first rather than ask for their name. People will share their name after you say yours. Disclosure in conversations is often reciprocated.
13. Use people’s names how they were shared in the introduction. Don’t call Alexander “Tony”, “bud”, or “honey”.
14. If you do not know how to pronounce someone’s name, ask them or someone who knows before you need to say it. If it’s too late, apologize for your mispronunciation then practice to correct yourself.
15. Do not break eye contact from the group in an introduction. Looking in the distance tells the person you are meeting that you prefer to be with someone else. As the conversation continues, you’re allowed to break more eye contact. Too much broken eye contact at anytime shows disinterest – a common relationship mistake.
16. For every arrival, there is a departure. Make your departure more gracious than a “bye”. Wind down the conversation. You can sum up a key point of the conversation (“I’ll make sure to get the report to you by Monday to prevent further hassle”), reference a private joke from the conversation (“Next time we meet, I hope you’ve figured out how to use the mower!”), or appreciate the person and the conversation (“Well, Andrea, I’ve got to get going but I’ve enjoyed talking with you”). For a complete guide to leave a lasting impression on people, discover the five ways to make a great last impression in Big Talk.

Conversation Etiquette

Do your conversations build relationships and make others enjoy being with you? Or do people want to run when faced by conversation with you? Good conversation etiquette with the following tips will have others happy to be in your presence.

Rules of social etiquette stem from respect and empathy.

17. Adjust your language, stories, jokes, and opinions to who you talk with. You are a cool guy to your friends, but telling your boss, “see ya dude”, will make him feel disrespected. The best socialites understand different people need different conversations. If you can get along with kids, the elderly, the homeless, and the wealthy, you are great with this conversational etiquette rule.
18. Be gracious when someone could feel embarrassed. Graciousness is the art of being kind and gentle. The best way I’ve found to be gracious is placing the burden on myself. Did someone forget your name? “Don’t worry. I’ve forgotten half the people’s names in this room already. My name is Josh.” Did the person trip over a cable? “Uh, hope you’re okay. I should really have covered that up so an accident doesn’t happen.” Graciousness will make you an angel to those in your presence.
19. Do not hold the conversation on yourself or what only matters to you. Talking about the health care system to a doctor is not your chance to seek a 10-minute health consultation for an ailment. Good conversationalists talk about their experiences and share their opinions, but they also ask questions about the person, expand on what others share, and show interest in what people say.
20. Share the speaking spotlight. If you have talked for a couple minutes without comments or input from others, you are hogging attention. Your conversational partner wants you to be quiet for a moment.
21. Let people finish what they want to say. This is the traditional conversation etiquette rule of “do not interrupt”.
22. When in a group, talk to everyone. Do not talk only to the hot girl you want to impress. It also means making the subject of conversation suitable for everyone. Telling a group about your latest Spiderman figurine that only your mate cares about is not socially suave.
23. Learn how to say no to politely decline requests and invitations. Refrain from a courteous no when you want to say no to create false expectations, persistent requests, or even conflict.
24. Do not participate in gossip or criticism. When someone gossips, Emily Post advises you to say, “But, Jim, Amanda says such nice things about you.” If the person ignores your attempt to steer the conversation away from gossip, say, “Let’s get off that subject.” If the rudeness continues, leave.
25. Researchers advise to keep a minimum distance of 60 cm (24 in) from conversational partners to stay out of their personal space. Even a kind word said one-foot away can be offensive.

Want a complete system to talk and make friends with anyone? You need more than etiquette tips when you are shy and have no idea what to say. I suggest you check out my full step-by-step guide called the Big Talk Training Course.

Everyday Circumstances

Whether you walk the streets or browse the shops, there is a right way to behave in everyday circumstances. These social etiquette tips mostly help you blend-in.

26. Prepare to behave differently than normal. Many etiquette articles advise you to be yourself, but I think “just be yourself” is bad advice. The people with the best social etiquette adapt to situations and people by understanding the rules of social etiquette shared in this article. What feels natural may not reflect social etiquette.
27. Keep your voice down. If someone has a loud voice, talk quietly to them – even whisper – and they will clue in then lower their voice.
28. Do not swear. If you must, find a PG-rated alternative on Thesaurus.com for your favorite four-letter word.
29. Arrive to parties and other events on time. Being late regardless of an excuse hints that you care little about those you meet.
30. Hold doors for people behind you. Let go when someone else holds the door. Always say “thanks” when a person holds a door for you. Appreciation takes no time and shows you liked their simple gesture.
31. If a door to a room is closed, knock then wait a few seconds. When no one responds, slowly open the door.
32. Here are my elevator rules. Hold elevator doors open for someone if they try to make it before the doors close. If the elevator is crowded or the door has been held multiple times, respect passengers by not delaying them any further. Should you be on the unlucky end of missing an elevator or it is crowded, stand back to let passengers know you are okay for them to go up or down. Other rules include move to the back, face the door, keep chat to a minimum, and avoid disturbances like phone calls or loud headphone music.
33. Walk on the right-side of sidewalks and shopping isles. Especially move over if you are slow. You can’t expect everyone to do this. An aircraft falling into your backyard right now is more likely than society walking on the right-side so walking etiquette is more about maneuvering yourself. Prepare to dodge and weave like Ali, keep objects like bags close to you, and give a quick apology when you bump someone.
34. Take your hat off at appropriate times. It’s not as simple as you think when considering the type of hat and the situation. Learn the etiquette of wearing a hat.
35. Give service staff and others you talk with your full attention. Get off the phone and take off headphones when paying for goods. It is rude and frustrating for someone like a McDonald’s worker to serve you when you talk to someone else. If you struggle to get off your phone, think of poor North Koreans. When an important politician dies, mobile phone use for a 100-day period is a “war crime” punishable with death.
36. Avoid these 16 email etiquette mistakes.
37. Leave a group or room to answer a phone call then keep the call as short as possible. Answer your phone at the dinner table to see the full effects of breaking this social etiquette rule. The rule is in place because nearby people deserve more attention than those who are distant.
38. When answering the phone, unless you know both of you have each other’s caller ID stored, greet the person followed by your name, “Hey, this is Josh.” If someone fails to introduce their name, it is polite to ask, “May I ask who is calling?”

Social Business Etiquette Principles

…nearby people deserve more attention than those who are distant.

Office gossip, loud employees, or time-wasting coworkers. Business can be filled with bad etiquette. With good business etiquette like most social skills, you create a better work environment and set yourself for a promotion. The same rules of everyday etiquette apply to social business etiquette with a few extra tips specific to what you encounter.

39. Greet coworkers when you see them for the first time in the day. Small talk is unexpected and can be frowned upon, but acknowledgment through a comment like “Good morning Jon” or a smile and a head nod beats out a cold look or avoidance.
40. Stand from your seat when your boss or someone of senior rank comes near your workspace. Also stand when you meet someone you haven’t seen for awhile. It’s a sign of respect. Stay seated if someone comes by daily. Stand when your secretary walks by your desk every 30-minutes will have her scratching her head and you getting no work complete.
41. Before you enter someone’s cubicle or office – even if the door is open or there is no door – knock on a wall or door then ask, “May I come in?”
42. Unless you are an international visitor from a company, the company’s owner, or a key leader to the meeting taking place, do not sit in the middle seats or at the table’s end. Even more so avoid the middle and end seats that face the door. These are for the big kahuna.
43. Sincerely praise a coworker for a project he or she worked hard on. “Diana, you put a lot of effort into this project and got good results. Nice work.” You will make them feel good and come across as a thoughtful person.
44. Focus on the face. Whether you give a presentation or wait on a phone call, avoid looking at devices that detract from your attention and someone’s feeling that you care about them. Look into people’s eyes to at least make them feel you are present.
45. Whenever you make small talk in the office, gauge the person’s attention to you. Leave if they seem occupied. Don’t let chat interfere with business. When you get interrupted, politely respond, “Unfortunately it’s a bad moment for me right now. Can we catch up after this report is complete?”

Etiquette Tips for Men with Women

You can have good etiquette without behaving like a gentleman in the Victorian era when a man took of his hat to greet a lady each time they crossed paths. Women notice a man who is considerate and respectful of others.

46. “Rudeness is the weak man’s imitation of strength,” said Eric Hoffer, a 20th-century American that loved to write about social issues. There is nothing manly about being rude to others. A gentleman disagrees without bitterness or anger. If an agreement cannot be reached, agree to disagree and focus on any neutral ground.
47. Walk in-front of a woman in tough crowds and on slippery surfaces. Hold her hand for safety.
48. Walk on the curb-side of footpaths. It’s a tradition of safety when a wayward buggy or horse would pose a hazard. Be a man by taking a wayward fast car to the face for your woman.
49. Allow women to enter doors and other devices for travel like escalators and cars before you. The exception is when a woman needs help. For a slippery set of stairs you walk down a step in-front of her, look her in the eyes, ask if you can be of help, then offer your arm.
50. Offer your arm the correct way in the right situation. The correct way to offer your arm is at a right-angle from the elbow with a small gap between the body and a straight wrist. The right-arm is traditionally what you offer but it matters little. Be ready to tighten your arm in case the lady slips if you are not already flexing your bicep for her (and your ego). Common situations to offer your arm are to help an elderly woman, walk with your partner to a formal event, or assist a lady cross ground she may trip over.

Etiquette Tips for Women with Men

Corsets and tea-sipping with a raised pinky is old. What follows are powerful etiquette tips women can use to be more appealing to men. It’s what men want in women.

51. When taking a man’s arm, place your hand with fingers together around his bicep then walk close with him.
52. Be positive about everyone. If someone is less fortunate than you, have pity. If your man does something you hate, keep silent and tell him in private. A lady gives her heart and treasures to those around her to make others feel loved and respected.
53. Do not groom in public. This applies to men and women. No make up, flossing, and hair adjustments unless in a private area like a restroom.
54. To be a “Victorian Lady” in the 19th-century, the dressing room was your sanctuary. You admired and beautified yourself so when you left the room, your beauty seemed effortless to the man you aimed to please.
55. Expose yourself to elegant women you admire. Note their habits and simple movements to learn how you can be like them.

Social Etiquette for Children: Tips for Parents and Those Wanting to Help Children

Good etiquette in children helps them make friends and be appreciated by adults. You get to enjoy dinners at restaurants or shop together without onlookers gasping like they saw a horror movie.

Everyday life offers situations to practice consideration.

56. If you think children are ruder now than ever, it is because of adults. “The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any,” said Broadway dancer Fred Astaire. Children and teens will be most considerate when adults model good behaviors. If you expect your child to do something, check to see if you do it. A good model, for example, can teach a child listening skills (a core part of social etiquette) by listening.
57. Everyday life offers situations to practice consideration. “Please do not run in the house because of the noise.” “We say ‘hi’ to guests in our home.” “Please take your plate to the sink to share the dinner workload.”
58. Have conversations with the child like you would with an adult. There is nothing awkward about conversing with a child. Through conversations you build a relationship and teach the child how to converse.
59. When the child talks with you, get him or her to look you in the eyes. Eye contact is key for communication and friendship.
60. Reinforce use of the two magical words: “please” and “thank you”. “Please” when asking and “thank you” when receiving.
61. Give little adjustments at the right time when talking with a child you care for. Correct pronunciation of a word or point out an unsocial habit. Regardless of your adjustment, never interrupt or embarrass the child otherwise you display poor social etiquette. Always be a role model.

Table Manners

Society is built around meals. In Eastern and Western cultures, it is a way to develop relationships, share good times, or extend thanks. What you do at the table (your table manners) affect how people nearby perceive you.

62. Order at a restaurant by firstly checking if everyone at your table is ready to order. Decide what you want now to not waste the waiter’s time. Close the menu to signal the waiter you are ready. If you cannot get the waiter’s attention and she is serving no one, it is good etiquette to ask a polite question (“Waiter?”) just loud enough followed by your hand raised to chin level.
63. When you are invited to someone’s home for a meal, offer to help prepare the meal. If they decline your offer, offer to help in other ways, “What other ways can I help?”
64. Take what you will eat. Never more. Edge on the safe-side of leaving more food than necessary for others to serve themselves. It sucks to get to the potato salad only to discover it’s all gone!
65. Observe your host when you are unsure what to do. Eat when your host does and observe what utensils to use.
66. Eat with your mouth closed and do not talk with food in your mouth. Did I really need to share that?
67. Use “please”, “thank you”, and “excuse me”. Such simple words make you a welcome guest at the table.
68. Sit up straight. Why is this a social etiquette rule? It shows you are engaged and makes table guests more likely to converse with you. To eat, move a utensil to your face instead of hunching.
69. Elbows on the table can be fine – even good – when you do not hold utensils. Leaning forward with elbows on the table makes you appear more interested to who you listen. Table guests can also hear you more easily when you speak in noisy restaurants.
70. At the end of a restaurant meal, who pays? On first dates the person who invites should pay. Split the bill whenever you are confused. Splitting does not have to be awkward. One person can pay while the other after dinner buys drinks in a pub or movie tickets. Keep suitable amounts of cash on hand for your share. Offer to cover yourself whenever someone wants to pay. If they decline your offer, thank them and leave it at that. The best piece of advice on “who pays” is to figure it out before the occasion to prevent ruining a nice time.

Transport

Whether you are in a cart pulled by a horse or on the dirty subway, transport etiquette ensures a smooth ride for fellow passengers.

71. Give up your seat to an elderly person, a disabled person, a pregnant women, and even a parent with a young child. Win an extra brownie point with your passengers by donating your seat to a person so he or she can sit near friends. Too bad if you had a rough day and wanted to sit. Most people will dislike taking a seat from you so stand up before making your offer with a smile.
72. Sit in a seat near no one before sitting near someone.
73. Keep your bag and other objects off the seat beside you. Get a car if you want privacy.
74. Carpooling is about consideration of passengers. Ask before opening windows, avoid repetitive habits like tapping, and sought out compensation for fuel.

How to Handle Tough Situations You Have Not Thought Of

Maybe you have thought of the tough situations below, but had no idea what to do. Boost your confidence by knowing how to deal with situations that make people squirm.

75. Ask for the owner’s permission as courtesy to pat, feed, or talk with their pet animal. Such behaviors with service dogs is dangerous because it distracts them from duties.
76. When translators are used, do not talk to the translator. Look at the person who speaks the foreign language when he or she talks and when you talk.
77. Address people appropriately with the right name and title. You have Doctors, Professors, Bishops, and Ambassadors, and Judges. I thought it was simple until discovering the hundreds of titles in Emily Post’s Etiquette. I cannot remember how to address a Senator so my advice is to prepare for the right way to address someone when you anticipate a meeting. Eventually you will learn how to address a Mayor (“The Honorable Bill Smith”) like you do with a Doctor (“Dr Smith”).
78. You were invited to the White House? Lucky you. Respond within the day. There are few accepted reasons to decline such an invite so be ready to go. Why would you decline anyway, I have no idea. Arrive a few minutes early because it is a cardinal sin to have the President walk in ready to meet you without your presence. Once you arrive and are escorted by guards to an appropriate room, if you are in a small group the President and First Lady greet you. Remain standing. In a large group the guests form a line passing by the President. Address him as “Mr President”. The use of “Sir” in conversation is also appropriate.
79. Flag rules. Only use a flag in good condition replacing it when damaged or discolored. When a flag is handled, keep it off objects. Never hang a flag upside down unless to signal distress. Never use a flag as clothing, but flag-designs of clothing is permissible.
80. Treat people who do work for you, such as a maid, as equals. When you think like this, you do not order them around or take advantage of their services.
81. When someone is about to leave after staying at your place, be a good host by showing the guest to the door then stand outside until the guest is no longer seen. This signals you have enjoyed the guest’s company and are not rushed to return to daily duties (even if you are).
82. Follow the dress code for invitations. Codes confuse. They vary from black tie to white tie and formal to casual. Learn more about dress codes.
83. A bad date is rarely one person’s fault. Never make the other feel uncomfortable because you are dissatisfied. Be realistic about perfection. Treat the person as an individual. No “all men are jerks” comments or thoughts.
84. Bad news like death and divorce is difficult to share. It is okay to gradually spread the news. The person suffering can tell close friends and family. They then can share the bad news with others over time. A person responsible for sharing the news should be given the responsibility only if he or she can keep composure.
85. When someone goes through a tough time, never say, “I know how you feel.” It’s condescending and about you. Nor should you say, “Call me if you need help.” It’s too vague. Instead say, “Please know I am thinking of you.” and “May I cook for you this Sunday night?”
86. When you hear bad news, a simple, “I’m so sorry to hear” or “I wish you the best” is sufficient. Never try to make lemonade out of their lemon with comments like, “Be thankful her suffering is over.”
87. Adoption is none of your business. Do not ask about biological parents, reasons, or anything else to do with adoption. Drop the thought that adoptive parents are saints because it places a burden on them and guilt on the child. Let the parents or child raise the topic when they want.

88. Rudeness happens. It is a complex issue that cannot be fully covered here. My quick tips to deal with rudeness are to consider ignoring the issue, acknowledge your contribution to the problem, and never give the rude person anything to build on like raising your voice or reciprocating rudeness. Know how to deal with difficult people and you will manage their rudeness.
89. You now know more than most about social etiquette so be careful about being a grouch at those who disobey social etiquette. Be tolerant and friendly. Do not be the old crank at the golf club who yells at non-members for wearing a baseball cap inside the clubhouse. Rudeness is bad etiquette no matter the situation. When you respect the flaws of others, you give them the chance to respect you.

How will you use these social etiquette rules? When will you show etiquette to others? Will you treat others with respect when they are respectful to you? Will you take the high road only when you gain something like a promotion at work or admiration from onlookers? Your character is defined by what you do to people who cannot do anything to you.

Author Leil Lowndes gives 92 tricks to become a better conversationalist and improve your social relationships. From body language tricks and words to say, to telephone techniques and social tactics, it’s all in Lowndes’ How to Talk to Anyone.

The 92 tips are spread throughout the following 9 parts:

1. How to intrigue everyone without saying a word: You only have ten seconds to show you’re a somebody
2. How to know what you say after “Hi”
3. How to talk like a VIP
4. How to be an insider in any crowd: What are they all talking about?
5. How to sound like you’re a peas in a pod: “Why, we’re just alike!”
6. How to differentiate the power of praise from the folly of flattery
7. How to direct dial their hearts
8. How to work a party like a politician works a room: The politician’s six-point party checklist
9. How to break the most treacherous glass ceiling of all: Sometimes people are tigers

As you can tell from the nine parts above, the book is pretty irresistible. Of course, a few of the 92 tricks won’t revolutionize your life, but even if you are a great conversationalist, you are bound to discover a few techniques to throw in your communication bag of tricks. Little techniques like the “big baby pivot”, “little strokes”, and “swiveling spotlight” add up to make you a conversationalist who can talk to anyone. If you don’t know what to say in a conversation or you generally struggle to talk to strangers, How to Talk to Anyone is bound to save you from drowning in conversations.

Part four titled “How to be an insider in any crowd” was the best part of the book for me. Some great tips were given on the topic of how to dial up a stranger’s hot buttons by talking about their topics of interest (Hint: It’s not asking them what they’re into). The advice strongly applies to all types of conversations. Whether talking to a celebrity or a stranger of the opposite sex, the gems shared in this part will be your go-to guide.

You will finish the book in no time and be talking to anyone.

In each tip, Lowndes shares a story of her own or a friend’s story to demonstrate how the tip can be applied in real conversations. This makes the book a quick and practical read. The gray box at the end of each tip summarizes what you need to know. It makes for a quick reviser to easily remember the flood of tips given to you.

Leil Lowndes has an amazing ability to write in an interesting manner as she paints images with picturesque words. You will finish the book in no time and be talking to anyone. I’ve talked with Leil after reading the book and she is as nice in person as her beautiful writing style.

How to Talk to Anyone is really a book to better your conversation skills and not a relationship skills book. The relationship aspect of this book is about having the skills to start a conversation and keep a conversation going. There is, however, some good tips for maintaining strong relationships that can also be applied to improving your conversations.

To begin improving your conversation skills with 92 killer tips and never be left in the cold during a conversation, get your copy of How to Talk to Anyone from Amazon right now by clicking here today.

UPDATE: Leil has released a new book titled How to Instantly Connect with Anyone, which contains even more little tricks to talk and make friends with people. I’ve read the book and it’s great like How to Talk to Anyone! All tips are unique. I encourage you to get both books.

If you want to start a conversation with an interesting guy, whether it is online through sites like MSN, Facebook, face-to-face, or text, I have a two-step formula.

The first step is to overcome your fears, anxiety, and other “inner-game” problems. You reading this article wanting to know how to start a conversation with a guy tells me you need to solve inner-game problems rather than have me write you a few magical lines to use on a guy you like. The second step defines what you say and how you say it. When you follow this simple two-step formula revealed below, you will know how to start a conversation with a guy and keep the conversation going.

How to Easily Talk with a Guy Like He’s a Friend

Why do you find it easy to talk with friends, but you do not know what to say to a guy you like? You know your friends. This makes it easy to talk about a lot of things and proves the point I want to make: you are able to talk to friends because you do not feel vulnerable to them. You can talk to friends because you do not think about their judgments of you. This opens a floodgate of conversation topics that are suppressed when you try to start a conversation with a guy.

Compare talking with your friends to talking with a guy you like. You can talk about a million subjects with a guy you like, but you say nothing because you worry about him liking you and making a fool of yourself. This negative thinking chokes your ability to talk.

You don’t think negatively and judge yourself around friends so a trick is to not do it around a guy you like. A simple technique to talk with a guy is to pretend he is already a friend. You will relax and conversation topics will more easily come to mind.

Let’s say a girl comes across a guy at a shopping center she wants to get to know. She tries her best to think of something to start the conversation. She can’t think of anything to say. Her mind tells her, “You can’t do this”, “He won’t even like you”, and “You’ll just make yourself look bad and embarrass yourself”. She has already lost her inner game. No conversation starter can fix this because what to say is not the problem. It is important to sort out these inner game issues that prevent you from starting a conversation so you become the woman men want.

…what to say is not the problem.

When you suffocate your mind with destructive thinking, you cannot start a good conversation. Winning on the outside starts with winning on the inside. Before you win in the conversation by starting a good conversation, get your inner game in shape. Do not worry what to say when you cannot speak.

Let’s look into the first step of how to fix your inner game, then we will discuss techniques you can use to start a conversation with a guy and keep a conversation going.

A Simple Technique to Feel Great and Be Positive Around a Cute Guy

Motivational speaker Wayne Dyer uses the phrase “no limit thinking” to release people from self-limiting beliefs. These beliefs empower or disempower anything you do. William James, a 19th century psychologist that pioneered American psychology, said:

The world we see that seems so insane is the result of a belief system that is not working. To perceive the world differently, we must be willing to change our belief system, let the past slip away, expand our sense of now, and dissolve the fear in our minds.

You must release yourself from these beliefs to confidently start and maintain a conversation. Be a no-limit thinker. Remove the limits you have placed on yourself by using a technique called “reframing”.

Reframing is a simple technique. It has you change your interpretation of a situation. Your aim with reframing is to create thoughts congruent with your goals and repeatedly affirm these thoughts to yourself. The better you get at adopting no-limit thinking, your confidence improves as does your ability to talk with people.

The girl at the shopping center can use the reframing technique by changing her current negative thoughts to positive ones about having a great conversation with the guy. Below are some thoughts the girl in our example is trying to overcome and to the right of each limiting thought is a good reframe the girl could use:

Negative Thought	Positive Thought Using the Reframing Technique
“I’m nervous.”	“I’m nervous because I care about the situation.”
“I won’t start the conversation well.”	“I will start the conversation well as I can do with my other friends and other people.”
“I’m afraid.”	“I wasn’t afraid last week when talking to a new guy so I don’t have to be afraid now.”
“He is so amazing and too good for me.”	“He farts, burps, and itches himself like any other human.”
“He won’t like me.”	“I don’t care if he won’t like me because I’m the prize. He is the one losing.”
“I don’t have anything to talk about.”	“I have thousands of thoughts that can be used to start a conversation.”

Tweet this funny advice.

Can you see how easy and powerful it is to overcome the limits you place on yourself? Reframing is an amazing technique. It may take a minute or two to come up with a positive interpretation of the situation, but with practice you’ll become faster and better at it. It can be used in almost any situation to boost your confidence, improve your happiness, and help you succeed.

Now you have fought off your doubts and anxieties about having a conversation with the guy, you can approach him and start a conversation. I’ve found that once girls improve their inner game with the reframing technique, the second step of conversation naturally happens. They feel confident and able to talk about anything. Still, I will share effective techniques and conversation starters below. The reframing technique frees your mind to start conversations, but it is reassuring to have techniques you can rely on to start a conversation.

The Situational Starter – Start a Conversation Every Time

The better you get at adopting no-limit thinking, your confidence improves as does your ability to talk with people.

To use the situational starter technique, notice your surroundings. Preferably make it something the other person is aware of or would be aware of once you use it.

In the shopping scenario, the girl could talk about things like the hastiness of shoppers or the weather… Wait. I hear you say this technique sucks. Talking about the weather is the simplest and worst use of the situational technique. It is boring and too common. Both examples may be ineffective in the shopping situation, but they can work when delivered by powerful nonverbal communication.

Be creative with situational starters. Make better use of this technique with in-depth situational influences. These rely on your creativity and involve discussions on unusual things about the situation. Your conversations will be more fun.

The girl could ask the guy how to locate a specific store or item; she could ask him where he got his hat because she would like to buy one for her brother; given the guy looks about 20 years-old, she could ask him for his opinion on whether her 20 year-old guy friend would like an item she thinks this guy has an interest in. This last conversation starter is more of an opinion opener, another good technique to start conversations, yet it still involves reading the situation. Use the situational starter or an opinion opener with creativity, and you have all you need to start a conversation.

Get more conversation starters to use on guys you like and other people by reading “101 Conversation Starters“.

What to Talk About

You have worked through your inner-game issues and started the conversation. The toughest parts are done. The conversation gets easier with time, but you still need to keep the conversation going. Starting a conversation means nothing if it stops dead. I will list some techniques and tips to keep a conversation flowing nicely with a guy, but browse the conversation skills section for more great tips.

What should you talk about? One thing you must not talk about is a boring topic. Do not bore him to death. Talk about passions, interests, conspiracies, and relationships. It is pretty simple to avoid boredom by talking about topics that have emotion! Talk about topics each of you are emotionally involved in to create an emotional link the two of you will remember.

If you don’t know an interesting topic, let the person be the topic. Myself and other guys love to talk about themselves. It’s only natural to talk about yourself because it’s the easiest topic to talk about. You can harness and leverage this with the guy by asking good open-ended questions.

An open-ended question is a type of question that takes more than a few words to answer. Examples of open-ended questions include: “What do you think about…?” “What’s something interesting you got up to last week?” and “Why do you enjoy…?”

It’s only natural to talk about yourself because it’s the easiest topic to talk about.

In the shopping scenario, the girl can ask the guy for his advice on buying a basketball because he is wearing a basketball jersey. She starts the conversation by asking, “Excuse me. I’m after a basketball for my brother. I thought you’d know a bit about it and was wondering what advice you could give me?” The girl would listen attentively using positive body language and show other forms of interest in the guy’s answer. If he doesn’t know much about basketballs, it does not matter. She could then keep the conversation going by asking him, “What things are you interested in then?” What matters is she has broken the ice and started a conversation.

She can increase her chances of keeping the conversation going by asking for his advice on an item she thinks interests him. Again, this uses the opinion technique and is valuable to make someone talk to you. She can guess what he is interested in by looking at his clothes, his friends, what he is currently doing, or anything else that is noticeable. She can keep a conversation going by observing the guy, listening carefully, and being a good “detective” snooping around for information.

How to Keep a Conversation Going with Branches

You can keep a conversation going by building onto what I call “branches” that grow from a conversation. Branches are further discussions about the topic discussed or even another topic by listening carefully to what is talked about. There are literally thousands of branches to a statement like, “I enjoy shopping with my friends.” Branches from this could be shopping experiences, why you’re currently shopping, and things about friends.

The girl’s question of, “What things are you interested in then?” is one example of a branch. Another example of branching the girl could use is: “Thanks. You do know a lot about basketball. How did you get all this knowledge?” She can build a conversation about the item and branch out into related topics she thinks the guy is interested in depending on his energy when speaking on the topic.

What If You Stuff Up and He Doesn’t Like You?

If you make a mistake and stuff up the conversation with the guy you like, all is not lost! Relax and laugh a little. Awkwardness only becomes awkward when you draw attention to it and feel embarrassed.

Also use the reframing technique by saying things to yourself like, “I stuffed up and am now smarter for next time” or “I’m the prize.” Failure is another step towards your success of effortlessly starting and continuing conversations with other guys. With enough practice, you will achieve conversation mastery.

From this article you have improved your inner game, you know how to start a good conversation, and you know how to keep an exciting conversation going. You just need to put the techniques to use when you find yourself wanting to start a conversation with a guy you want to meet. Let me know how it goes for you!

Lastly, if you want to learn more about how you can become a confident, mature, attractive lady that naturally attracts men, there is one online resource I recommend you learn more about: Catch Him and Keep Him. Catch Him and Keep Him is an ebook by Christian Carter to help you become a better woman so you can find and keep Mr Right. Click here to learn more about it.