by Joshua Uebergang aka "Tower of Power"
I use to suffer from severe passive behavior and communication. I would not say what I wanted, escape confrontation because it was uncomfortable, dodge responsibility because I could be blamed, and generally sidestepped who I truly was as a person. I compromised my character. People interacted with a mask of behavior that protected my vulnerable self.
Passiveness, otherwise known as submissiveness, is the opposite to aggression. Passiveness literally means detachment and acceptance. It is acted upon rather than acts on something. Passive communication involves “keeping under the radar”, “not sticking up for yourself”, saying yes when you really want to say no, and overly “selfless behaviors”. While it is different to being shy or quiet, shy or quiet individuals are often passive.
Amongst my reasons for passive behavior, is the benefits of passive behavior and communication, and why it is such a severe problem in families, the workplace, and human interactions. I want to share with you the deep reasons behind why people avoid “sticking up for themselves” and many other passive behaviors in this article. I believe once you understand this behavior, a powerful world is revealed before your eyes that would otherwise have remained hidden. … Click to continue reading →
Posted on Friday, November 21, 2008
Become Confident and Comfortable in Conversations
The Big Talk Training Course is a one-of-a-kind training program that'll show you how to start conversations, keep conversations going, and make friends even if you're alone, afraid of people, and get mind blanks.
Click for more »
by Joshua Uebergang aka "Tower of Power"
Have you ever looked at someone and instantly felt they were an interesting person? I think we all have sensed an interesting person. These people didn’t open their mouth to spark this tickle of curiosity. There is a list of characteristics about these people that I have learned to cultivate in myself that I’m going to share with you in this article – so you can be more interesting without having to say a word.
There are two aspects to communication: verbal and nonverbal communication. Because these interesting people do not say a word to make you curious about them, their interesting characteristics come from good nonverbal communication, narrowly known as body language. Nonverbal communication gives you the power to be interesting among many other benefits. … Click to continue reading →
Posted on Tuesday, November 11, 2008
How to Be Socially Confident
Mini-seminar reveals how to feel comfortable about yourself in social situations so you impress people and make them like you.
Click for more »
by Joshua Uebergang aka "Tower of Power"
It can be tough enough starting a conversation with someone you don’t know, yet alone trying to start a conversation with someone you think is attractive! You are confused with what to say. You wonder if he likes you. You want to know how to make him like you. You are anxious! All this is only the first challenge!
If you are woman wanting to start a conversation with an interesting guy, whether it is online through things like MSN, Facebook, and Myspace or face-to-face or text, you must work through two primary challenges or steps. The first step is to overcome your fears, anxiety, and other “inner game” problems. Even if you think you are confident – because you are reading this article wanting to know how to start a conversation with a guy – that tells me you need to solve inner game problems rather than have me write you a few magical lines to use on a guy you like. The second step defines what you say and how you say it. Let’s look into these two steps throughout the article. … Click to continue reading →
Posted on Monday, October 13, 2008
by Joshua Uebergang aka "Tower of Power"
On October 23, 1990, David Pologruto, a high school physics teacher, was stabbed by his smart student Jason Haffizulla. Jason was not a teenager you think would try to kill someone. He got straight A’s and was determined to study medicine at Harvard, yet this was his downfall. His physics teacher gave Jason a B, a mark Jason believed would undermine his entrance to Harvard. After receiving his B, Jason took a butcher knife to school and stabbed his physics teacher before being reprimanded in a struggle.
Two years following the incident in a New York Times article covering this story, it was reported that Jason raised his grade average to 4.614, which exceeds the perfect average of 4, by taking advanced courses. He graduated with highest honors.
How can someone as smart as Jason do something so dumb? Jason received above perfect grades and still emotionally lost himself by trying to severely wound his teacher. The answer? Smart can be dumb. Smart is not communication-dumb because studies show there is little or no correlation between IQ and emotional intelligence, but in this article we’ll look at how logical intelligence can hurt a person’s emotional life.
This article may generate controversy, but I feel I give a balanced discussion in sharing my experience, knowledge, and getting you to think deeply about the topic. Whether you are intelligent, “mentally-challenged”, or curious about this topic in understanding those smart people in your life, I am sure you will get a lot of useful advice from this article. … Click to continue reading →
Posted on Saturday, October 11, 2008
by Joshua Uebergang aka "Tower of Power"
This is a book review of Dr. Maxwell Maltz’s The New Psycho-Cybernetics: The Original Science of Self-Improvement and Success That Has Changed the Lives of 30 Million People.
Maxwell Maltz became a plastic surgeon in the 1920′s and successfully changed people’s physical appearance for decades. In his private New York practice he operated on people from all around the world like well-known celebrities. People entered Maltz’s practice with poor perceptions of themselves as they underwent operation in hope to look and feel like a new person.
Some clients following their operations left Dr. Maltz’s practice feeling happy with the surgery he performed. Other times, though patients had successful operations, they left feeling unhappy. It wasn’t too long until Dr. Maltz operated on them again to correct another “wrong feature” of their body. Dr. Maltz became curious. … Click to continue reading →
Posted on Friday, September 19, 2008
by Joshua Uebergang aka "Tower of Power"
You arrive for a party at a friend’s house and open the front door. It seems all eyes are on you as you walk into the room. Nervous thoughts rush through your mind: “What are they thinking about me?” “Does he think I’m weird?” and “Is that person laughing at my looks?”
I frequently get asked by people how they can overcome such thoughts where they try to read someone’s mind. They want to know how they can eliminate worry over people’s judgments and thoughts in a conversation because it creates social awkwardness.
I use to have the same problem. I worried over people’s judgments of me – in conversations and in general social situations. I stand at 6’9” (206cm) and attract attention wherever I go. Some people go about their day as I walk by, while others gawk in amazement. (I don’t know if they realize it, but I’m tall and not deaf.) Thoughts such as, “Why are they looking at me like that?” destroyed my ability to socially enjoy myself until I discovered a few secrets I will share with you in this article that transformed me into a confident, happy, powerful person. … Click to continue reading →
Posted on Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Update: What Christmas present did you get for yourself? You can tell me ;-) None for me this year.