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How to Brainwash People: Techniques to Put an Idea into Someone’s Mind

It was another day in Khost, Afghanistan, when Shakirullah Yasin Ali, aged 14, climbed into the driver’s seat of a car, turned the ignition, and said a final prayer. The car was wired to a bomb. Shakirhullah knew his mission to drive the car near clustered British and American people then detonate it. He was about to die – or so he thought. Stopped and caught, he later said, “All I know is what the mullahs told me and kept telling me: that the British and Americans were against God”.

30 years before that on November 18th, 1978, 909 people drank Flavor-Aid mixed with cyanide and valium. The group knew death was imminent. They were members of a cult reportedly persuaded by their leader to drink the poison. Known as the Jonestown incident, this is one example of multiple ritual suicides committed by cult members.

What kind of power can convince people – from frightened teenagers to large groups of adults – to do something as extreme as ending their own lives? Read more

How to Be Charming to Men and Women

Charm is the attractiveness of an object or person that interests, pleases, and satisfies. When you know how to be charming to men and women, you are charismatic and attractive, but also attentive and empathetic. Charm is good people skills.

You are already swimming in the wake of those who courted their way ahead in a career or relationship with charm. Charming people get more affection from the opposite sex, get respected by strangers, and get the raise they want at work. Charming people have an easier, more enjoyable life.

In medieval times (and still to this day) magic had charm because of its mysteries. It had unknown traits that left outsiders dumbfounded. When you charm men and women, they wonder what magic you wield to make people respect and like you.

The good news is if you have as much charm as a backyard rock, you too can transform into a captivating diamond. If you feel you can never outshine the one always topping you with a cooler line, relax then follow some of the best tips showing how to be charming to men and women. Read more

Controlling People: Signs of a Controlling Person and How to Deal with Them

Alicia was once free, happy, and prosperous. She regularly met with friends, enjoyed working, and made many decisions on her own until two years in a relationship with Randy. Her boyfriend began to control Alicia. She had no idea what was going on. Controlling people can do that.

Alicia didn’t think her boyfriend was someone with a controlling personality – two years later she is still confused about her boyfriend’s behavior. She tells her friends that Randy controls what she does and how she feels, but they say it’s typical for men to behave that way. She has gone to a counselor. Everyone says to work on her relationship more. Alicia sometimes thinks if she loves Randy more, he will change.

Few people know the signs of a controlling personality. You could even be unaware you’re a controlling person. By the time such behaviors are evident, years of misery pass in the relationship with much verbal or physical abuse. The sooner you can identify the signs of controlling men or women, and how to handle these people (but more importantly yourself) with the advice I’ll give you in this article, the better you’ll protect yourself from a dangerous person who can create an abusive relationship. Read more

Top 15 Dumb Mistakes People Make in Relationships

One of my friends recently asked his girlfriend, “What’s one dumb thing I do in the relationship?” She looked at him in shock, “Where do I begin? If it has to be one, I’d just say you can be a real ****.” “What!” he replied, “How dare you. Now it’s my turn.” A dam wall broke. An hour later the couple finished talking.

After studying communication for almost a decade, I notice we make many dumb relationship mistakes and communication errors that I’m about to share with you. I use the term “dumb” not to put you down, but to label the mistakes lots of people repeat. Put an end to these 15 relationship mistakes in no particular order: Read more

Principles and Tips to Deal with Difficult People

The investigative in-law. The bossy boss. The crying child. The nasty neighbor. The cranky colleague. You may prefer to categorize them all as “jerks”. The list of “jerks” that make life miserable go on. Fortunately, there are principles and tips to help you deal with difficult people.

Principles do not change. Water is two hydrogen atoms and one oxygen atom – this will not change. The North poles of two magnets repel – this will not change. Gravity rips you down to Earth – this will not change. The unchanging laws of science are parallel to the unchanging principles and laws of communication to deal with difficult people.

If you have a difficult person in your life, you may think he or she is impossible to deal with, yet the person is not an impenetrable rock. It’s human! And humans follow laws of psychology and behavior you can benefit from. This article will provide you with judo-like principles to convert seemingly impossible forces of a difficult person into tips to effectively deal with them. Read more

4 Reasons Advice and Other Solutions Kill Relationships

Orders, better ways of doing things, and simple suggestions – these are solutions you likely send to people, which kills your relationship with them. A solution may appear harmless on the surface, yet in this article I’ll dig deep into why your solutions are not only ineffective at changing people, but also killing the emotional lives of people you touch.

“Hang out the washing”, “Stop moping around and cheer up”, “Fix what you broke”, “You need to improve your skills with customers”, “Get a new attitude”, “Obey your mother and father”. There are four reasons why such statements kill your relationships. Read more

Why Problem Solving Doesn’t Solve the Problem and the Real Solution to Permanent Change

Have a problem in life you cannot fix? The damn thing sticks around. You try hard to solve it, but make little progress.

Let’s say the problem is being overweight. You have 20 pounds you want to drop. The extra weight makes you feel bad and not look your best. This motivates you to lose weight. You build the willpower and determination to drop a few pounds to feel good again and improve your looks.

Through determination to solve your weight problem, two weeks later you jump on the scales to discover you are nine pounds lighter. You are ecstatic! The mental tension about your weight eases. You feel more comfortable with your body. Your willpower drained a lot from you so you return to old habits. Read more