One of my friends recently asked his girlfriend, “What’s one dumb thing I do in the relationship?” She looked at him in shock, “Where do I begin? If it has to be one, I’d just say you can be a real ****.” “What! How dare you. Now it’s my turn,” he replied. A dam wall of topics the couple needed to talk about freely gushed into the open. An hour later they finished talking.

We make many dumb relationship mistakes, which I have noticed after years of study and observing communication and human behavior, that all cannot be listed here. I use the term “dumb” not to put people down, but only because a lot of people repeat the same blunders. Put an end to these 15 relationship mistakes, in no particular order: … Click to continue reading →

Posted on Wednesday, April 15, 200913 Comments

Orders, better ways of doing things, and simple suggestions – these are solutions you likely send to people, which kills your relationship with them. A solution may appear harmless on the surface, yet in this article I’ll dig deep into why your solutions are not only ineffective at changing people, but also killing the emotional lives of people you touch.

“Hang out the washing”, “Stop moping around and cheer up”, “Fix what you broke”, “You need to improve your skills with customers”, “You need to get a new attitude”, “Obey your mother and father”. There are four reasons why such statements kill your relationships. … Click to continue reading →

Posted on Tuesday, January 20, 200914 Comments

Nod your head with me if this, or something like it, frequently occurs in your life: You have a problem in your life you cannot remove.

Let’s say the problem is being overweight – as it is for many. You have 20 pounds you want to drop. You are sick of the extra weight making you feel bad and not look your best, which motivates you to lose weight. You build the willpower and determination to drop a few pounds to feel good again and improve your looks.

Through determination to solve your weight problem, two weeks later you jump on the scales to discover you have lost nine pounds. You’re ecstatic! The tension you once had about your weight eases. Because you feel more comfortable with your body – and your willpower drained a lot of mental energy – you return to old habits. You take less action to lose weight. … Click to continue reading →

Posted on Monday, November 10, 200816 Comments

This is a book review of Robert Fritz’s The Path of Least Resistance: Learning to Become the Creative Force in Your Own Life.

Few of us realize our habitual behavior. We remain blind to the patterns that take us to our desired destination or the future we want to avoid. Author Robert Fritz, developer of the Technologies for Creating, has developed a field of study called “Macrostructural Patterns” explained in his book that demystifies habitual behavior to help you create what you want in life. … Click to continue reading →

Posted on Friday, November 7, 2008No Comments