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Free Test to See if You Have a Social Anxiety Disorder

Take this free online test to see if you have a social anxiety disorder. The quiz is based on the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV), The Liebowitz Social Anxiety Scale (L-SAS), and my knowledge having experienced the disorder.

I was “undiagnosed” for 7 years. This stopped me getting help and helping myself. I lived believing I was broken, but it turns out you can turn your life around once you know the problem. I hope the test and resources provide guidance to help you.

Here are three notes about the test. Your results are 100% confidential and never stored. The quiz is not intended to replace a one-on-one professional diagnosis. Respond to each question by picking the answer you think is most accurate. Get started with 16 simple questions below! Read more

How and When to End a Long-Term Relationship

There’s likely a long-term relationship in your life you’re better off ending right now. It could be your marriage, but more likely a partner you see or a toxic friend.

How do you know when to end a long-term relationship? When you know it’s best to finish it, how do you end a long-term relationship without having the person burn your house down? This article answers these questions. Read more

Ways to Resolve Conflict When Others Avoid It

You are rare if you want to resolve conflict instead of avoiding it. Based on my 8 years of teaching conflict management, most people want to learn ways they can avoid conflict. Chances are your co-workers, family, and friends do not want to solve that tough issue between you and them.

To survive and thrive in any relationship you must know ways to manage people who prefer to overlook “negative feelings” then put a rosy-glow on everything – and even how to make yourself not be afraid of dealing with relationship warfare. Conflict is unavoidable even to those who avoid it because our differences in culture, values, needs, and perspectives will always cause collisions.

If you aim for conflict avoidance, it isn’t avoided or somehow solved. Problems escalate, resentment builds, and relationships die. What gets avoided is enjoyable relationships, the true depths of human beings, and reality. You must learn effective ways to resolve conflict when others prefer to pretend perfection. Read more

How to Manage Stress in Relationship Communication: Keep Calm with Scientific Stress Management

Not enough time to exercise, boss pushing for work to be completed, children are loud, bills to pay, shopping to be done, housework to do, partner asking for your help. To top it all off you’re suppose to be nice to people by communicating effectively with them in a confrontation? Yeah right!

Why Stress Makes Communication Difficult

You find it hard to communicate in stressful moments. So do I. There’s a reason why it is hard to listen and not yell in tough situations that all relationships face. Science proves it is near impossible for you to communicate well when under stress. Read more

Principles and Tips to Deal with Difficult People

The investigative in-law. The bossy boss. The crying child. The nasty neighbor. The cranky colleague. You may prefer to categorize them all as “jerks”. The list of “jerks” that make life miserable go on. Fortunately, there are principles and tips to help you deal with difficult people.

Principles do not change. Water is two hydrogen atoms and one oxygen atom – this will not change. The North poles of two magnets repel – this will not change. Gravity rips you down to Earth – this will not change. The unchanging laws of science are parallel to the unchanging principles and laws of communication to deal with difficult people.

If you have a difficult person in your life, you may think he or she is impossible to deal with, yet the person is not an impenetrable rock. It’s human! And humans follow laws of psychology and behavior you can benefit from. This article will provide you with judo-like principles to convert seemingly impossible forces of a difficult person into tips to effectively deal with them. Read more

5 Truths About Fear: What Fear Doesn’t Want You To Know

We fear being alone; we fear being crowded. We fear the doctor; we fear bad health. We fear the opposite sex; we fear not knowing the opposite sex. We fear making decisions; we fear not making an impact. We fear problems; we fear opportunities. We fear failure; we fear success. We fear job interviews; we fear unemployment. We fear asserting ourselves; we fear not being heard. We fear being pushed; we fear being pulled. We fear breaking up a relationship; we fear staying in the relationship. We fear meeting someone; we fear meeting no one.

Wow! Talk about an amazing list of contrasting fears! The truth about fears is they seem stupid and irrational. What fears do you have that drive you crazy?

You can fear one side of the story and the other at the same time. It is possible to simultaneously fear talking to someone new and not meeting new people because fear hides the truth. I will reveal the truth about fear to you in this article. Read more

Why People Remain Quiet, Shy, and Non-Assertive: The Benefits of Passive Behavior and Communication

I suffered from severe passive behavior and communication. I would not say what I wanted, avoid confrontation, and dodge responsibility to not get blamed. This compromised my character. People interacted with a mask that protected my vulnerable self.

Passiveness, otherwise known as submissiveness, is the opposite to aggression. Passiveness literally means detachment and acceptance. It is acted upon rather than acts on something. Passive communication involves “keeping under the radar”, “not sticking up for yourself”, saying yes when you really want to say no, and overly “selfless behaviors”. While passiveness is different to being shy or quiet, shy or quiet individuals are often passive.

There are benefits to passive behavior and communication that make it a problem in families, the workplace, and other interactions. I want to share with you the deep reasons behind why people avoid “sticking up for themselves” and many other passive behaviors in this article. Once you understand this behavior, a powerful world is revealed before your eyes that would otherwise have remained hidden. Read more